Au Revoir September

 Just a smidge of my September shenanigans... enjoy!

Strolling Downtown

Strolling Downtown by littlemer featuring a dark pink lipstick

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes

Now Playing: ...just click me :)

So I remember giving out some pointless facts about me so here's a little, maybe not so little, post about the more intriguing aspects about me. So it's sort of like a little heart to heart that that includes my past, future dreams, present goals, and all that! First off, to future Merissa, here is a picture of how you look like at 18 in the year 2013:

1. I want to write a song. I've tried songwriting and it was so difficult but even so, I really want to create a song! I'm not sure what kind of vibe I want it to have, or what it'll be about, all I know is that I want to create a song from scratch, something to call mine. 
2. I want to all my loved ones feel important as much as I can. I want to inspire them to be caring, loving, forgiving, appreciative, grateful, wonderful, adventurous, good sports, ...and most of all, happy. 
3. I dream to have a family, one boy and one girl. Best friends. A loving husband who is a kid at heart yet knows his priorities and how to handle difficult situations. One who appreciates nature walks, healthy breakfasts, the holidays, loves children and loves all of me.
4. I want my parents to live the rest of their lives in a beautiful state. I don't want them to suffer and I want to show them how much I love and appreciate them. I want them to live a long and fulfilling life. The thought of any of my loved ones going "away" scares me to pieces and I can't stand that fact. I want to take my parents travelling. Make them do something they would never do. Try new foods, meet new people, experience new cultures and ultimately... fall in love with life all over again.
5. I'm moving in about 37 more days and I want to create a sanctuary out of my home. I'm planning to paint a mural on one of the walls in my room, I'm not sure what it should be, but I'm thinking Paris themed, or cherry blossoms. I want a new start with my family, it feels great to start off in a new house, clean slate, everything behind us and starting anew. 
6. I've currently been getting 90s in all my courses right now and my present goal is to maintain a decent GPA. I just want to make my mom proud. We've had a rough past and I feel that I'm able to start over with her. I'm really sad it happened so late, but it's better than nothing. My goal this year is to stay on top of things and not lie to myself about like I have the past 4 years.
7. Another dream of mine is to travel overseas and do charity work. Build schools, collect water, feed the hungry and build orphanages. I can't fathom the thought of having no family, let alone no food, water and shelter nor education to survive. I find it so unfair that it is not a privilege but a need to have the basic necessities and millions of people worldwide go without it everyday. I believe that world hunger/poverty can be prevented if we stopped being so selfish and work harder into theses issues.
8. I want to plant a forest of trees, or at least have my own garden. I'm a tree hugger and I don't care what anybody says about it! To have my own garden to frolic in like a fairy would be so wonderful. I'd take care of the plants like they were my own children! 
9. I want to have a mini art studio in my home or somewhere I can rent a place where I can just paint. It's always been a passion of mine to learn to paint beautifully and sell some paintings when I have the time. I've been so discouraged about my art for a while but I hope that I get back into it soon. I'm thinking about getting a new sketchbook. 
10. I want to work in a retirement home at one point in my life and get to know all the elderly people there and all their stories and bring spirit back to those that have been feeling lonely and neglected. I just want to bring happiness into people's worlds.
11. To live a life of pure happiness, bliss and neglecting the fear that prevents me to do so. I've been terrified about how this life will end and what will happened. I want to get back in touch with my faith. I've been in dark places where I have lost my beliefs and I feel that slowly, but surely I'll get back. I'm in the slowly part. 
12. I want to see and have my parents see their children get married. I know I won't be getting married for a long time and I hope that they'll be able to see that. It scares me. I really want them to be with me forever and I hate having to grow old and grow up. I want my sisters to have the perfect wedding but better, the perfect marriage. 

I know there are a lot more that I dream about, wish to achieve etc... but there you go! 

<3 Little Mer

Your Art Matters

Now Playing: Mr Brightside by The Killers

I finally finished class for today so I'm just waiting for one of my close friends to go work out together... so I decided to write a post! However, my mind has been swarmed with a bunch of university things... a bunch of boring university things. So I haven't had the time to think about what I really want to talk about. *thinks for 15 minutes exploring the internet for an idea*

AH. I'm a huge One Tree Hill fanatic. If you don't watch this show, PLEASE DO. I adore it so much. But I still haven't finished the entire series. I'm two seasons away and it's such a beautiful plot. This post is not going to be about One Tree Hill in general but about my favourite character, Peyton Sawyer. I feel that Peyton represents my lost years. She's very mysterious, music junkie, and puts a lot of her loved ones before her. She's also an artist on the down low. I know, her character is just a fictional one but I relate to her so damn much it scares me. We both struggle with the same things and sometimes in the same ways and cope with it the same. It's like i'm watching myself on TV. (Yeah, it kinda freaks me out, but it makes me feel good at the same time.) 

Anyways, I'm struggling right now. There are days where I feel so put together and days where I lose my identity. Life has been getting too hectic for me to stop and appreciate it. What was I good at a month or two ago? A year ago? 5 years ago? Was it my passion? What are my passions now anyways? There are days where I'm so lost, and nothing in the past 18 years of my life had really mattered. Do I even matter? What makes me valuable? How do I think of myself?  I know, it doesn't matter whether or not you're good at something, all that matters is that you love what you do. But I'm not sure what it is anymore... what it is that I love, let alone like, to do. No matter how much people try, I don't believe they will ever understand where I, or anybody else, is coming from... so sometimes I'm just... "why bother?"

*3 hours later*

I just had a workout and now my mind has been flushed so my thoughts may be a little biased because I'm in a better mood. I'm currently on the bus typing this... hehe, I feel like a cool kid. 

Anyways... where was I? Oh yes. Peyton Sawyer and my art. Peyton just wanted to change people, not because they had a horrible personality and was in need of a reality check but change people as into inspire them... through her art. I guess that's what I wanted to do too... or something like that. Inspire people. But something that Peyton and I share is the lack of confidence in what our potential may be. I always feel that in whatever I will do, there will be something or someone who can do it better. It didn't really matter to me then and it still doesn't but it's just something I think about. What's my "thing"? What am I know for? I've been too busy living the temporary part of life than working on what will last when I'm gone... if that makes sense? It's not that I want to be the best at something, it's how I want to "ignite my legacy". (Haha, took that quotation from frosh). 

I always ask what kind of impact I make in people's lives and I feel that the impact is not a good one, due to some circumstances. I care too much. I love too hard. I lose myself. That's just how it is. Like many of my posts, I'm not sure where this is going. I'm actually so paranoid right now because I have my first psychology evaluation and I'm kind of panicking. Agh! 

Okay. Let me finish this post before I panic any further. Let's just say, I feel like I'm a person too hard to handle. That everything I do freaks people out and... they eventually leave... as Peyton says, "people always leave." I don't know what my legacy is yet and maybe I'm not supposed to. But on the bright side, I think I'm going to invest in another sketchbook, and start sketching and try out some new styles? Yeah. Putting myself together bit by bit. I hope this helps! 

<3 Little Mer

Tis the season for knitted clothing

Family

I know I haven't written in a while but university has been taking up my time and I'm still working on that crazy frosh video because there's so much footage and I still haven't gotten time to learn how to work things out. So before I continue to the meat of this post I'll do a little update in point form, yay.

• Had a get together at one of my best friend's house and it was pretty heart warming.
• Birthday was a beautiful day. Had dinner at East Side Mario's and spent time with my family.
• Consistently been working out with is a refreshing idea.
• Starting to write again, which is perfect at this time of the year. 
• Starting to settle into school, and finally caught up.
• Got a MacBook Pro using my tuition grants, woohoo
• Submitted my first assignment for university yesterday (how exciting...haha)
• I've been listening to soca 24/7 
• I will start a photo collage sort of thing and post it at the end of the month!

Okay. That's enough. So shall we bite into what this post is all about? As you can tell, you're going to read about my viewpoints on family from hard contemplating and experience. I have a lot of controversial thoughts about it but this is mainly for my future self and future child to read to remind me of them so whoever's reading, please don't get offended. We all have our own opinions. But yeah this is sort of like a checklist/guideline kinda thing? Here we goooo!

RESPECT

I believe that just because you are somebody's parent, it doesn't give you an authority to treat your children like shit and expect them to praise you. I'm a high believer of reciprocity and to have the best relationship with your children, you need to treat them with as much as respect you expect. Starting at young age they will learn understand you more and more as they grow older. They will see how much you are appreciative of them and use it as a guide to act the same way. Ya dig?

COMMUNICATION

Try to not raise your voice often or at all. I know, our children will do things that really do annoy the hell out of us but we also do the same. Communicate. SPEAK. Yelling doesn't put a thought through someone's head... instead it'll scare your children and they will become distant because they'll be too afraid to talk. Don't say anything impulsive out of anger, sadness, or frustration. Learn to control your words because you will never know how harmful they can be to our children. Talk about anything. Have dinner at the table, no television, no phones, just exchanging thoughts. Don't be someone your children are intimidated to approach... treat them like a friend. If they have certain conditions, care for them. We all just want to be heard. Make time for them whether it be something small like going grocery shopping together, or a walk around the neighbourhood...do it. 

TRUST

Nothing feels better than when a child is fully trusted by their parents. But it doesn't come that easy. They should earn it, just as you should earn their trust. It cannot be given, but if someone makes a mistake, do not let them start from square one. Revert to the above... speak to them. Understand them.

INFLUENCE

If you have respect, communication, and trust down... it's all up to you on how you influence them. Ultimately, with having those three ideas beautifully combined, you should be a great role model... Be somebody you would want your children to be. It will change your world. 

LOVE

I'm sure we will have done HUGE things for the love of our children but I'm sure the little things matter too... Be corny, go out on little family dates, encourage them to try new things, support, go to soccer/volleyball/basketball games or whatever floats their boat, BE THERE. We only have so much time, do something good with it and it those moments will be cherished as you will be cherished along the way.

Here's a list of things I'd like to do with my future family!

1. Have a set dinner time to talk about everybody's day
2. One day of the week dedicated to family
3. Go on summer picnics and summer/autumn hikes
4. Christmas Kris Kringle
5. Interrogate my children about their crushes...haha 
6. Create a family time capsule 
7. Go to a Raptors basketball game!
8. Ice skating somewhere down town
9. Family photo shoot, some for different seasons/occasions
10. Travel to Europe... everywhere in Europe
11. Embarrassing family sweaters with silly nicknames 
12. Chore lists, evenly distributed, even for the parents!
13. Painting/art classes/dance classes
14. Trying new dinner recipes once a week
15. ...I'm too tired to think of anymore but yeah!

<3 Little Mer

Ps, this is a really quick one because I'm behind in psych, management, and biomedical ethics...so yeah. Ta ta for now.

18

So I'm going to be 18 in a couple hours. Yes, my birthday is on September 11th and it is such a tragic date. That's one of the reasons why I don't like celebrating... because so many people have lost their lives on their day and it always breaks my heart every year. I've also had a history of having bad birthdays so I'm praying tomorrow will be perfect or at least close to perfect. My parents have given me so much my past 18 years and I couldn't be any more thankful. I love my family so much and all my friends that have been there... whether it be the eighteen years, four years over high school, one summer or two weeks. Thank you. 

18 seems like a big number and a small one at the same time. But I guess it's a pretty big deal and that's what scares me the most. I'd remember I'd think I'd always be 5 years old, playing with the chitty chatty wind up teeth. Then I turned 6 and I thought I'd always be 6, writing letters to my mother in my Blue's Clues mailbox kit... and then I turned 7. When I was 7, I thought I'd be 7 forever, having my mother teach me how to bake with my little Easy Bake oven, then I turned 8. When I was 8, I was so sure I'd be a power puff girl one day... Buttercup. But that didn't happen because I turned 9, and I was determined to be an amazing 9 year old artist and become famous but you can't be a famous 9 year old artist when you turn 10. When I was 10, I remembered watching commercials about third world countries and how badly I wanted to help them. I went to the Philippines and experienced their distraught... so at 10, I was ready to turn 11, which meant another year closer to being able to help. When I was 11, all I wanted to do was sing. But that passion changed when I was 12, when all I really wanted to do was travel to France, which is still one of my passions. Then I turned 13, and I remembered being a moody brat about to start high school. All I wanted were books, and I was so sure when I turned 14, I would write a novel. I started with some pages and threw them away because I turned 15 and was so interested in film and becoming an actress. But I turned 16 and wanted to be a nurse. But I realized that plans made earlier would not always pull through and when I turned 17 I really wanted everything in the world to be right. Tonight, I turn 18. You know what's missing in these past 18 years? Appreciation. I look back at my 18 years and everything I just spoke about were things I wanted to do for me. I never got to appreciate all the love and support I got, I'd always see what was lacking. I'm going to be an adult, and I literally shed tears about it. I don't want to grow old, or see people around me grow old. I know that's a concept that's definitely inevitable but it's a concept that will always scare me regardless. 

I was always looking for more or something different, but I'm sad...because it took me this long to realize how much I have to appreciate. I have this huge urge to cry and I'm not sure why. Growing up may not be a big deal to certain people but it is my biggest fear and an even bigger fear to not live it to my greatest potential. To be as beautiful as possible as a person inside and out. To help others live a life of love, laughter, improvement, faith etc... Not sure where I'm going with this, like all my other previous posts, but yeah. My gratefulness for the people that have entered my life, left my life, stayed in my life especially, thank you. For putting up with me. I can be so ignorant and selfish and spoiled but I'm so glad you were parting of the teaching process. I'm very happy with what I have now and what I'm able to offer. I may have loved and lost love, I may have fallen and have quit, but I feel this is like a second chance at life, living it the right way. Most important, thank the Lord for including another year of life in my journey.

So today I had a pre-birthday spiritual cleanse because I usually get the blues right before my birthday because it is my deepest fear after all. It's basically doing all the things I love to cleanse the mind and prepare myself. So... Today I had one class that started at 12 and ended at 1, therefore, I had a bunch of time to kill. I had an iced coffee as a treat, and a nature walk for some meditation. I did the usual morning ritual, music and note taking by the window, probably my favourite spot at school for now. I finally found a class where I know people and it was a great interactive class. Then I met up with my friend and we caught up so much. We literally only got close because of frosh, but we went to high school together for 4 years and I never expected to be close with her. She surprised me and took me to this nice little cafe restaurant we have on campus and it was such a nice thing of her to do. We walked around and I found another amazing spot on campus that is not as busy as the study spot. We had so many little laughs here and there and I appreciated what she did for me today. We worked out together for the first time and it was so refreshing. I'm also getting a Macbook Pro on Friday from my student loan grants which is great! I got home and spent some time with my mom and here I am writing this up... what a beautiful day.

<3 Little Mer

PS I promise the frosh blog post will be coming up soon. Work has been piling up but by the weekend, I shall get my hands on putting it together! 

High School

So I just started university as I mentioned in the past million posts... and it's such a different experience from high school. I love both for different reasons. In high school you constantly see a tight knit group of friends and have classes with most of them, amazing lunch gatherings and having a lunch exchange with everyone. Everything happens at lunch, all the events so you don't miss anything. It's like family. I'm not saying university can't be family but it's a damn huge one. One thing I hate in high school are the stuck up people who literally seem to claim they created the universe.... Horrifying how clueless and idiotic some people may act when they really have no authority whatsoever. With university there's a wide variety of cultures which can influence you in a positive or negative way, but I guess it's how you choose who you really are. People are mature... at least more mature than high school. There's more freedom, better food (I guess if you're into fast food), new new new people, lots and lots and lots of new people, older people, bigger rooms, harsher teachers, scarier teachers, late nights, early mornings, but with all this craziness happening, it makes you tougher and better once you take another step into the world. As I got home, I finally got my laptop charger and I haven't used this laptop since halfway of high school, and I saw all my photos and started reminiscing so I decided to put some photos up and write some tips/favourite memories and experiences from high school that can probably be related to university. 

1. Be nice. Seriously. Be nice. Don't let people take advantage of you though. Make yourself known for being kind but not in the "Okay, she'll totally do my work for me". That was me. I literally did people's work because I had nothing better to do. But still... alongside being nice you can be everybody's acquaintance but keep a few near and dear to your heart.

2. Don't trust anybody. Please, save the tears and questions on "Who told you that?" because everybody's a blabber mouth. Better to be safe than sorry.

3. Don't leave bananas or fruits in your locker over the breaks. Bananas will turn into a lump of coal and apples, pears etc will create a nest of bugs in your locker. Don't forget to clean out your locker before breaks. Seriously.

4. Don't treat teachers like garbage. It's a waste of both yours and their time. They're human beings. Not saying I treated teachers like garbage... but I've seen a bunch of people use that as their reputation. End of the day, you're really stupid, pathetic, and desperate. 

5. Don't buy food everyday. My high school was beside this small town mall which was basically 90% food stations and they had this one place that sold this heavenly jerk poutine and it was tempting. But seriously...save money once a week for university or college or something better than a temporary poutine. Little goes a long way and you're gonna need every penny. But I'm not saying never to buy it, just don't go crazy, dude.

6. PEE OR POOP BEFORE YOU GO TO SCHOOL. I hate how people claim to be so hygienic but behind the scenes there's poop on the floor, toilet paper everywhere, hair in the sink, they miss the toilet... (girls, how do you miss the toilet when you're sitting down?) I don't know why, but my high school bathrooms were so humid and I have horrible gag reflexes so I'd never go to the bathroom there until I had an emergency. Unless you have a hot spot in the school where barely anybody goes and they're fairly clean then by all means, pee all day if you'd like.

7. Don't wear your heart on your sleeve. I know high school crushes and first loves may not seem like a big deal to other people but heart break is heart break and it all hurts the same. Don't start to be afraid of people at such an early stage in life. Don't make high school relationships your top priority because sure, if you have an awesome relationship but it's screwing your marks up, that's not going make a living in the future is it? I'm super duper guilty of this one and trust me, I'm still suffering the consequences. Boo hoo.

8. Get involved. At least in one thing. You want to remember high school and getting involved is the best way. I mean, if all you do is go to school and go home there's not much worth remembering about. Sports, lunch events, social events, clubs, raising awareness, start one of your own. Better to be remembered as a fool than not be remembered at all. Plus it never hurts to try something new. You find out you like it, great...if you don't like it, at least you found out you don't like it...right?

9. Keep all your notes. Your interests in the future may change and you may need these to excel in what you really want to do. Explore your options while you can. Don't let people force you to do what you don't want to do or something that doesn't make you feel happy or good about yourself where you're constantly shoved you're not good enough. Do something you love. I know, cliche, but it wouldn't be one if it wasn't true. You never work a day in your life if you do something you love. Promise.

10. RISK IS NECESSARY.

<3 Little Mer

When You're Sad

A beautiful friend of mine found this little gem on Tumblr and I decided to keep a note of it on here. Enjoy.

When you’re sad:

1. Write letters to the people you love. Don’t seal them; don’t send them. Instead, stick them between the pages of library books.

2. Eat raspberries off your fingertips.

3. Venture outside and observe natural life. Watch a honey bee suck the nectar from lavender plants. Watch a snail slowly make its way towards the shade of a tree. Watch a hummingbird innocently fly above your head. Realize how insignificant you are.

4. Smile at strangers; say hello. It will improve their day and your own.

5. Write lists. They can be about anything.

6. Read several pages of the dictionary. Learn new words. Write down the ones you wish to remember.

7. Never feel compelled to apologize when you don’t feel sorry. It’s okay that you’re honest. It’s okay that you have a different opinion from someone else.

8. Read books and watch movies from your childhood. A healthy dose of nostalgia is okay. Immerse yourself in your past innocence.

9. Walk to a park and get on a swing. Go as high as you can; feel limitless. The world is yours.

10. Eat if you’re hungry. Food is not the enemy. You are a human and need food to survive. You deserve to eat. Put those raspberries on your fingers and sprinkle sugar on your tongue. Taste the summer breeze and sweet aroma of jasmine flowers.

11. Don’t marinate in your sadness. You are not a steak. You are a person; you’re irreplaceable. Open yourself up to contentment. Bathe in the rivers of Glee. Go for hikes with Satisfaction. Sleep in a warm cocoon of blankets with Bliss. Let endless happiness overcome your hopeless sadness. You deserve to be happy. If life is a game and you are the referee, be biased for once and let happiness win.

$$$$$$

Money, money, money. Today I will be talking about money and how little I have of it because of university. I'm currently in the library waiting for my bus to start running again. Anywho, I don't understand the concept of making students go into so much debt.... I cringe every time I buy something new with an exaggerated price. I understand name brands, electronics and popularity have some reason to have a bunch of digits for a price but when something is unnecessarily expensive, it ticks me off and makes me feel uncomfortable. But let me tell you a story that happened to be about an hour ago.

 

So I had two lectures today: management and language practice for French. Nobody in my French class had the books needed except for two people. I was wondering whether or not I could bargain on the French book because I wasn't sure if it was....

 

O M G. Wait. The kid sitting next to me is playing Crash Bandicoot and I just thought I had to say that was my favourite game ever on the first play station. And Spyro. Talk about short attention span.

 

...used for the entire year or half a year so maybe I could rent it instead which was way cheaper. I headed off to the book store with one of my friends in second year and I had a feeling my card was going to be declined. It was. I wasn't really embarrassed because I mean, who's card wouldn't get declined in university. Sigh. Two small books costed me $162 dollars altogether. He ended up using his card for me. But I really felt so uncomfortable because I absolutely, genuinely, positively HATE spending extreme amounts of money over nothing. But it was urgent, and yeah...

 

...O M G. SORRY. Super short attention span is at it again. But another boy beside me just got charged 81 dollars for his library late fees. And the security guard came. I'd pee in my pants if that were me. Anyways... sorry.

 

I wish money wasn't such a big deal. Money prevents people from living...and I don't mean getting a car, not being able to travel or go out to dinner or the theatre. But I mean, literally living with basic necessities. So many people die without being able to afford the things they should already have and that is such a tragedy and horrifies me to the bone. It literally tears my heart apart to see people living in horrible conditions and sometimes I find it so hard to live my own life because things are so unfair for people. I think the main problem in the world is selfishness and close-minded-ness. I just really want to leave the world knowing that all is well with the entire population... is that too much to ask? I highly believe it's possible and support every cause trying to change the world. Money doesn't change the world. It starts within the mind. The mind chooses what to do with the money. To build houses. Send food. Create educational institutions. It is the thought that makes others happy... not the money.

Just a little mind vomit here! Comment down below if you feel the same or how you feel about situations stated above!

On a side note, here's a little sneak peak of my day! First lecture ever, first shwarma poutine ever, first spirit wear ever and outfit of the day!

 

 

<3 Little Mer 

First Day

OKAY. I know. I KNOW. I'm supposed to be writing about frosh week but I decided to wait because I have so much footage and there's WAAAAY more to come so yeah. Plus I have no time to edit them together. Plus I have a bunch of readings to catch up on. Plus I'm wasting time for reading to write a blog post so yeah. I'm typing as fast as I can while keeping up a conversation with three people on Skype because life has been so crazy and surreal and I can't keep up with it and it scares me sometimes! So anyways instead of orientation, I'll talk about my very first official, not so official, day of university. 

I woke up at around 6 30 in the morning. I had no idea how to get to school because I live in a new neighbourhood and the public transit is a little bit hectic. But my mom decided to help me out and without her today, I wouldn't have had the best first day of university ever. It was crazy. The bus that travels through my neighbourhood only comes through our rush hour times which is 6 to 8 in the morning and 4 to 7 in the evening. I left my house at 8, so I was so freaked out I'd miss the bus. I really love getting to plaecs on time. We got there on time and it was such a refreshing experience trying something new with my mom, and especially finally getting my mom out of the house doing something new WITH me.

 She's always been one of the "stick to the program" type of gals but I'd love for her to get out there a bit more and I'm glad she spent today with me! It was such a smooth bus ride, so much better than the buses in Toronto and Markham! We met some nice people that helped us, like this old man taking his daughter to the university for the first time all the way from Bowmanville. I love parents/relatives that are willing to do that for their family. It's such a beautiful and heartwarming sight. My mom and I smiled at each other and it was great. I gave my momma a tour of university which meant I actually knew where I was going...or did a good job of pretending to hehehe. I bought books from the book store and they were much cheaper than people normally spend on one book which I'm pretty glad about. I bought myself two hoodies for spirit wear and just had endless talks about everything with my mom in the student center. Funny, I went to school and didn't really need to be there because I had a tutorial which is basically where profs. give you work, but I didn't have any lectures before hand so basically another summer day for me. I was totally in summer mode all over again.

Next, we decided to figure out the route home. It was hectic. We didn't know that the bus in our neighbourhood didn't run before 4 pm...and it was only 10 am. We just went around the mall...pretending to check out sofas but truthfully our asses were tired. We had lunch and has some Bento Box with teriyaki chicken, sushi, salad and yam fries. It was so delicious. I got my monthly pass for the public transit across the library and while we were walking there, we saw that the Farmer's Market was set up! We strolled around and literally sat for hours talking and laughing and just feeling good. There were food trucks, organic snacks and bread, and music it was GREAT. Better than great actually. It was fantastically greaty great great! We got some olive bread and blueberry scones for charity, and Ukranian perogies! I love my mom so much for doing this for me today even though it may not seem as much but I will be writing a post about her in the near future because it's the least I could do. I bought some healthy snacks for school to munch on and I love how my mom just really encourages me and my ideas and what I want to do etc etc... it makes me feel so good about myself. But there's more to that! 

We finally got home and munched on some food as we waited for my nephew to come home from school ....with scars on his knees because some mean kid pushed him down during recess. WHY ARE KIDS SO MEAN TO EACH OTHER. Anyways...he was so adorable. 

I loved today SO much. Thank you to all who made it such an amazing day x! 

<3 Little Mer 

September

Welcome, September <3 I'm so glad you're finally here. You're my favourite month... not only because it's my birthday in about 9 days, but because of the following:

You're the start of something new usually a new school year and a new season. It's also another start of another year of life for me. I love school. Honestly. No matter how much I complain about the work, I secretly love it. I love getting involved and meeting new people. This year is pretty big for me. I'm turning 18, which is crazy! I'm afraid of growing older, though, so it's sort of bittersweet. It's inevitable, of course, but it's one of my deepest fears. Some days it's okay, some days I feel uncomfortable about it. Anyways, I'm also halfway through frosh slash orientation (I'll be writing about it tomorrow because it's my first day of school tomorrow as well). September is the start of improvement and events to meet new people and along the way, some of them will, like high school, stick with you for the four years of university.

I feel like September is a refreshing month with perfect weather. Autumn is my favourite season. Scarves and the trees and the leaves, coats and sweaters, cozy boots, blankets and hot cocoa. It's such a heartwarming season that leads up to Thanksgiving which is one of my most favourite holidays! There's so much to be thankful for. 

Yesterday I went to Unionville with my parents to spend the last official day of summer. It looks like a long French street where a lot of wedding photographers take the bride and groom for photos. Nothing better than a French looking street with beautiful flowers and beautiful newlyweds. It was such a relaxing day and then I went out to have lunch at a restaurant called Pickle Barrel. They have amazing calamari. I had a chicken hummus wrap and topped the day off with a strawberry cheesecake Sunday. I went back to school shopping! I went to Target and bought myself 5 notebooks that were pretty cute and were only 90 cents! I was looking for a lightweight bag and got this new cheap bag at Walmart for back to school. It was floral and one of those old school looking ones and it was only $24. My mom told me to get things I needed for school so I got it. Meanwhile, as I was shopping, she was at the slot machines around the area for fun with her friends. I got home and as she called me and my dad to come pick her up, I said we'll come get her in half an hour so she could still play for a little bit. When I called her again she told me she won 740 dollars. She has AMAZING luck, I'm telling you. And I felt like a little good luck charm. She said she was going to order some food to celebrate! I stayed home waiting for her and my dad, checking out some books for school. I'm glad that I bargained so much that my 5 books costed about 325 dollars. I need my books as soon as possible because school starts tomorrow and I haven't even started on my assigned readings. So tomorrow is the first day of school for me, and for my nephew. I'll be dropping him off while I take my mom on a university tour and grab my books and I'll take her out for lunch, my treat! 

Anyways, I kind of got off track. I was waiting for her to come home and I was already half asleep watching How I Met Your Mother and she woke me up. I went downstairs and saw 3 cases of ribs and chicken, 2 cases of chicken breast quesadillas and a case of seafood linguini. SHE'S CRAZY. The food was delicious... I was bloated. I went to bed afterwards and then she woke me up again when she saw my bag that I bought. I didn't really want an expensive new bag because I have ton, but I needed one that was like a backpack because purses hurt my shoulders when they're heavy, obviously. She was like "Omg, you have to return that bag! Where's the tag!?" and I didn't ask any questions and found the tag for it.. I was half awake so the next morning I didn't even realize that had happened.

I woke up the next morning and I walked into the room with a huge present by the door and she told me to open it. She didn't think I was going to buy a bag because she had for my birthday so she decided to give me an early birthday present instead. I laughed so hard. Not only because I always ruin surprises but because the bags were SO similar except my mom's was from Guess and it was so much better than what I had bargained for and I love her so much for always surprising me on my birthday. She also got me two beautiful infinity scarves, two packs of socks (I told you I loved socks) and a new jean jacket which was also from Guess. She's such a sneaky mom. She always takes me out shopping, but I usually never get anything because it's too expensive for me, so I just comment on how pretty and such this or that is. She knows my taste. I felt kind of horrible because she wanted a jean jacket too but she got one for me instead. The love I have for my family is so indescribable, it makes me giddy! 

It's already been two days of September and I'm loving it already. I love that I have work to catch up on. And the weather's great. And my family is great. And I'm back on track with things. And my birthday is coming up (sort of not excited but it's alright). But overall, I am so grateful at this moment in my life, things have never been better. That's all for now, I have this horrible habit of rambling forever and ever but yeah... take care! Good luck to all those starting school or starting something new this September!

<3 Little Mer